Lesley Wheeler Not Half Bad
"Bad" was spawned by the Old English "baeddel,"
which means "hermaphrodite." This sounds about right.
Transform me into a "head," or worse yet,
a "chair," and you'll find a nasty muddle
under the seat, where the lost superhero
mates with the dust bunny. Such scenes can shock
worldlier deans. It feels bad to say no.
It feels hermaphroditic. If there's a cock
in my knickers I've carelessly mislaid it
in the labyrinthine folds of my mysterious
femininity, yet I am obstinate,
greedy, so I must have one. Natural
women take the crap job—my sex is spurious
(etym. L., spurius, bastard). I'm no girl.